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Lenin was an unwashed negromancer entombed in an obsidian corslet that once belonged to the baleful archdaemon known as Adolf Hitler. A sickening laughter erupted from his knurled lips as he flung back his hood, revealing himself to be none other than Vladimir Lenin. The Communist lieutenant leading this wretched host haughtily swaggered forth and revealed himself. Heavily armed reinforcements poured into the desolate streets of Neo-Detroit, scrambling to confront this warrior of divine, patriotic might. However, Sonic's fervent onslaught and furious pelvic thrusting did little to stay these endless armies of Communist subhumans. "Fuck you, I'm Sonic the Hedgehog! It's time to rock the fuck out!" Sonic bellowed with blind patriotic fury, tearing his stylish jerkin asunder and shattering the darbies and chains that bound him with little effort. He then played a puissant riff on his axe-guitar, severing the barriers of space and time with this heavy metal melody and summoning divine astral fuckflames from the heavens above to slay the fuck out of his baseborn adversaries. They burgeoned forth, binding Sonic's arms with fetters of wrought iron and naquadah. He parted the waves of Communist blackguards before him, casting these depraved hordes into the netherworld with several well-timed roundhouse kicks.īloodthirsty Communist marchwardens snarled and sputtered incoherently from this undeniably patriotic sight.
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The hedgehog swaggered forth with utter surety, his wispy chest hairs fluttering wildly in the wind. Sonic leapt majestically from his motorcycle and cast away his arms to fight the Communist host with his own cartilage-soaked fists. He nodded his head in approval when each blade found its mark between the eyes of a Communist sword-thain, splitting their heads in two. A small chuckle escaped from Sonic's gritted teeth as he threw a cavalcade of knives at his adversaries. He relished every tumultuous moment, letting the endless spray of Marxist blood wash over his impossibly statuesque chest and loins as he carved their gnarled heads asunder with his axe-guitar.īlack metal roared from the speakers on Sonic's bike as he unsheathed his serrated katana and used it to deflect the onslaught of bullets fired at him by the unwashed masses foolish enough to stand in his way. Sonic the Hedgehog soared through the red sky on his Harley Davidson™ motorcycle, slaying the fuck out of every Communist soldier in his path. Some Americans eke out an existence in exile, dreaming of the day when the Communist scourge will be eliminated so the divine children of Washington can yet again thrive as in the days of old.īut until that day arrives, courageous Americans congregate together in secret societies, orchestrating the downfall of the Marxist empire and fighting Communists whenever they can. "He’s 68 years old now, and he’s in good health, but he just wants time for himself.However, not all patriotic lifeforms have been wiped out.
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"After 40-some odd years, he just decided that he wants to rest," Lenny said to People Magazine.
RICHARD SIMMON SAYS YOUR GAY MEME MOVIE
Related: 20 Stars Who Totally Vanished After One Major Movie FlopĪnd yet, he won't and still hasn't given his fans any answers, and that is why they continue to pursue him.Įven though Richard hasn't said anything publicly, his brother, Lenny, has, according to People. It seems everyone wants to know what the heck happened to Richard.
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According to Distractify, Richard claimed that In Touch Weekly had hired the investigator to track him down. private investigator for apparently placing a tracking device in his car. This lawsuit was followed by another in June 2018 when he sued an L.A. However, Richard ended up losing the libel lawsuit and had to pay the fees of the defendants' attorneys. Although he did make some noise when he sued the National Enquirer, American Media, and Radar Online for suggesting that he was transitioning into a woman and that's why he was no longer in the public eye. But after his stint in hospital, Richard vanished again.